Sim Racing Survives Another Clone Race
Comedy Central had their fun and laughs, once again. The comedians went out and bred 10 horses using the Not Impossible x Sword Dance x Distant View breeding line for each and every horse. They cloned the same horse over and over again!!! Then, they got themselves a restricted race and entered all these 2-year olds and ran them for over a mile. The catch…this was the first time start for each horse. So we had a field of brothers and sisters going to the post. Very worrisome. It concerned the programmers of our Sim universe so much they had more security surrounding the race course to insure no disasters would bring down the system. Not even Delta Airlines has this amount of security (I’m not sure if that is saying much or not).
Anyways, this is not the first time Comedy Central has cloned horses and raced them against each other. And I fear it is not the last either.
In any event, the race went off without a hitch and we all survived another bout of clownidis. I have to admit, despite the inherent risks, the race was rather interesting to watch. I’ve been to the track where you see that old lady lay her two bucks on the grey horse to win. The reason she goes with the grey horse is that it is easy to pick out of the field and watch. That was not true in this race. Not at all!
Every horse in this race was grey!!! I felt good for my mother as the horses had more grey hair then she did for a change. The only horse that was dark was YouknowIcantdance, but technically, he was a dark grayling.
Since these were all brothers and sisters competing, we did witness the bickering you would see between siblings. As the horses walked onto the track, No Luck Duck and Possibly a Loser had their tempers in dismay. They were fussing so much there was no doubt these two mares were related. The race was even delayed slightly so the handlers could separate these two youngsters who kept nipping at each other.
The race started with Genetic Makeup and YouknowIcantdance matching strides for the top spot early on. The rivaling sisters somehow joined each other with No Luck Duck and Possibly a Loser running side by side. Impossible Silver, Brent and Clone Wars ran as a trio a few lengths off the lead. I’ll be Distanced, Not Very Close and The Hundred Grand rounded off the field.
Moving past the half mile marker, Genetic Makeup inched away to nearly a full length lead on YouknowIcantdance. The two fighting mares (No Luck Duck & Possibly a Loser) kept at it, each taking turns briefly sticking their head in front in front of each other. Impossible Silver broke away from Brent and Clone Wars with I’ll be Distanced, Not Very Close and The Hundred Grand still trailing.
Genetic Makeup pulled away from the field by over 4 lengths by the 3/4-pole and it looked like either No Luck Duck or Possibly a Loser would break away and make a bid for the 2nd spot. YouknowIcantdance at this point had enough and threw in the towel. Making a late move from the back was Not Very Close.
Down to the wire no one was able to catch Genetic Makeup who won as the 7-1 co-favorite. Heck, every horse in this race was 7-1, so they were all co-favorites. Genetic Makeup scored a 3 ½ length win in a resounding speed of 62.
Not Very Close was successful in the stretch and was able to circle around the bickering gals and took second.
Impossible Silver ran 5th virtually the entire race. He apparently had enough of his quibbling siblings and pranced around them to pick up the show spot.
Forth place was virtually a dead heat between our fighting pair. But officially, it was No Luck Duck taking it with a speed of 50.683 just nipping sister Possibly a Loser who recorded 50.671. Those two were ruthless and both Jockeys filed objections against each other for the continuous bumping. The Stewards denied both objections stating that neither Jockey was at fault as it was the childish temperament of the two horses that caused the alleged infractions. In any event, the Stewards have banned both horses from ever competing against each other in the same race at California. But all other tracks seem to be free game for them.
YouknowIcantdance ended up in the 6th spot, a good 11 lengths back. She beat out The Hundred Grand who moved up a few places to get the 7th spot solely because other horses tired out faster.
Brent was eighth and never made any significant move in the race. The ninth spot went to Clone Wars who ran on empty and was also non-competitive.
Finishing in last, and possibly correctly named, was I’ll Be Distanced. He finished a good 16 back behind the winner.