This is Only a Test
ExamStakes
Grade I
Seven furlongs
Fast Dirt
$250,000
Fillies and mares, 3 years old
by Sonny B. Boiled
So here’s a “test” for you… find your horse in the BTB article below! Don’t get “mixed up”. RUE MARNA FANGS!
IN RARE WE MAD might certainly be upset when she discovers that today’s competition includes no Bargain Bred horses but the one in the horsey-mirror. The daughter of WOKE UP DREAMIN (HOLY BULL) has been cleaning up on the BBRS circuit, and is perfectly suited for today’s 7f distance. There were certainly easier spots this weekend, but her 97 SP in an open allowance last out may have looked like a revelation to bargain-guru Hawkz. A longshot, but certainly not one to be discounted.
NILE LOVERS has done little wrong, save a lackluster, tiring performance last out when trying 9 furlongs and the cream of the 3yo filly crop. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, the trainer with ‘ny’ right in her name wheels this Tiznow back to a distance where she has never been defeated. In fact, draw a line through her last start and you’d swear this horse was the one to beat and a Simulated Personal Ensign in the making. It’ll be “Christmas in July”…in August… if this one rebounds as expected.
I FIRST ONE has a trainer who saw the Forestry from the trees two starts back when trying a mile for the second time. It wasn’t a horrible effort (2ndin a listed stake) but the speed fig encouraged a return to sprint company. She hasn’t been the ‘first one’across the line since January this year, but shows up everytime and contests the finish at 7ish furlongs. Not out of the question, but needs a speed boost.
ESSO PRESS hasn’t done big things yet but definitely looks like one with a big future. No Graded appearances yet, but she’s 11-for-11 in the money, and an A.P. INDY half-sister to millionaire G1 turf horse NO PRICE TOO HIGH. The trainer does ok for himself, and shouldn’t be “desperate”, oh, for immediate success…as this one is getting steadily faster with time.
GODS HOTT EGO has a SIM pedigree that would make Iant wince himself into a coma (Ghostzapper x Storm Cat x Gone West). Fittingly, she’s scored fantastic fortunes at 2 which have not been repeated since – a Grade 1 win at a mile and a sixteenth, no less. Connections know all the tricks of the trade, but she has only responded with a steady decline. Turf-to-dirt angle in full effect, but if you’re lookin’ for the goods, I suspect they are elsewhere.
YAY WE A FARSE has 3 stakes wins at sprint distances, and led for a half against the best 3yo fillies in the second leg of the Triple Tiara. It’s clear she wasn’t suited for 9 furlongs that day, but it is unclear if she is suited for Grade 1 company. She’ll be hustled to the front from the one hole (she’s never been headed out of the gate in a sprint). They make them fast in Japan these days…everyone else is a Bluegrass product.
SWORN MEEK TED possesses a nice little closing kick that she used to pick off today’s rail horse in her last start, a listed stake victory. A three-race win streak, a three-digit speed figure last out, and post-position #3 today for the Fear the Shark crew. What’s not to like? (That’s a rhetorical question, but she does get a class-check today).
PREEN WED DETOX is absolutely drunken with success these days – six races in a row, Grade 1 winner last out, top speed figures at sprint distances… everything is going right for this trainer and his daughter of U.Song, as he is known amongst the cool crowd. More of the same is expected. Can a Grade 1 race ever be considered a drop in class? The only thing cooler than this would be a Bluegrass Derby winner… which coolk already bagged in 2009. More ‘power’ to ya!
SEA OAR FUR CLAM has definitely got her ship in order these days. After enduring seven painful attempts to clear the Allowance N2L condition, this impeccably bred Giant’s Causeway x A.P. Magic (that’s a mare) has wrung out two straight listed stakes wins, with speed figs on the upswing, too. The oddsmaker ought to come to his senses – he must have been out mending fences when pricing this beast at 15-1. The rest of the field has “legitimate grounds for disquiet”.
LEST CANOLA blows no Smoke when it comes to Sprints – this is her 14th career start, and 12th under a mile. Ostensibly a 6f specialist, she was competitive at 7f but a little even-paced down the lane. Last race was her best ever (3rd in a G1 at 6f), and she’s not far off the hot-shots in this field on speed figs. If you expect another move forward, then I expect to see her number 11 lighting up the toteboard (that’s 1stthrough 4th for the reality-racing challenged).
LONG BEAUT EATS BOOTS is another U. Song x Seattle Slew filly, and another Graded Stakes winner. Hmmm…. What pedigree combo will I be breeding next week?
Masters of the obvious will know the answer to that, as well as support this gal at the windows. Her best efforts have come at today’s 7f distance…despite an unplaced 107SP run (whaaaaaat?) in the G1 Chestnut Stakes. She didn’t threaten last out vs. many of these same 6f sprinters, but perhaps she Boble’d out of the gate. Dangerous (and not only because she eats boots).
HIHO SQWINKL wishes to inform the author that “sqwinkl” isn’t really a word (neither is “hiho” but give me a break!). It’s not my fault that her breeder decided to use letter combinations dreamt up in a purple haze at a Korn concert or something. No matter, this Midnite Lute discount scratch-bred stomped a whole lot of these in the Equinics before a nice 2nd in the CaliforniaOaks. Rightly targeting the big time, she unfortunately turned in 4 straight performances as a world-class pacesetter. 7f may suit her nicely but its hard to know what to expect this time out. Proceed with caution.
WE CANE U QUEASY is one of “those” horses who has earned nearly half a million smackeroos, yet is still eligible for non-winners of three life. She’s G1 placed more than once, but looked awfully queasy being eased in the Bluegrass Oaks, and was second in a confidence-booster allowance race last out. The outside post stinks, the distance may not help… it may be time to ”smith for gold” on the turf with this talented GC x Smart Strike gal.
LORIMONGOUS is also not a word, but it’s my article and I will mangle your horse names as I (and the BTB editors/censors/TASER-wielding masters) please. #2 Dirt Sprint Rank means she is the most respected entrant in the field and procured the best riding talent, too. That’s humungous, in my book. If you know someone named Lori, then this will have unintended special meaning for you, and make me look like some sort of empathic genius/jerk. Oh…right. The horse… yeah, she’s REAL good. She occasionally throws a clunker but has triple-digit SP in 3 of the last 4, and the distance should not be a concern. It will be a bit of a “broohar”ha in the stretch as she is yet another stalker/closer type, but I imagine she is sharp for this following a nice Grade 3 effort only three weeks ago. Not a Glorious value at 6/1,but she is the co-favorite on the morning line.
How did we do on today’s quiz? The answer to THE EXAM STAKES appear at 12noon Saturday, EST. Good luck.
Key:
RUE MARNA FANGS! ANAGRAMS ARE FUN
YAY WE A FARSE FAR AWAY EYES
ESSO PRESS REPOSSESS
SWORN MEEK TED WEEKEND STORM
GODS HOTT EGO GOT THE GOODS
PREEN WED DETOX WEEKEND POWER
SEA OAR FUR CLAM CAUSE FOR ALARM
IN RARE WE MAD REWA DREAMIN
NILE LOVERS SILVER NOEL
I FIRST ONE FORESTINI
LONG BEAUT EATS BOOTS BOSONGABOUTSEATTLE
LEST CANOLA CASTELLANO
LORIMONGOUS GLORIOUSMOON
HIHO SQWINKL QWIKN SHILOH
WE CANE U QUEASY CAUSEWAYQUEEN
Sonny B. Boiled DonnyBeisbol