THE HORSE INVESTMENT CLUB
EPISODE #7 THE HANDICAPPING CHALLENGE
Yes….yes….ok. Yes, thank you for coming. Yes ma’am, that is the end of the Stable Tour today. The Stable Tour has been shortened a little, this weekend and next to accomodate the big handicapping challenge between Mr. ED and the Mystery Handicapper over at the TEST BARN. We are heading over there now, if you would like to join us? Well, ok the grandstand entrance is straight ahead and at the end of the building turn left. Thank you for coming out this morning and have a nice day.
Ok, we had better hurry if we are going to MC this event……
TEST BARN CREW
(cast of characters)
HORSE IDENTIFIER
Larry “done it all” Fine
SPECIMEN TAKER
P. “phil em up” Taker
STATE VET
“DOC”
HOT WALKERS
Joe “big wave” Johnson p/t surfer
D. “stocks” Witter p/t stock broker
GAMBLER
Hundred Dollar Harry
RACE HORSE TRAINER
Iwanna Wynn
HORSE
Mr. Ed
First off I would like to welcome everyone to our first ever TEST BARN HANDICAPPING CHALLENGE and introduce you to my co-host for today the avid horse racing fan, and always funny, the Silent Comedian Harpo Marx (Harpo honks his horn).
The Challenge is brought to you today by the “CREW” at the TEST BARN, in an effort to bring you the very best handicapping information available in the Sim. The format of todays challenge is a simple one, the contestants are to pick a winner in each of the four pre-selected races and will be scored for each selection that hits the board, in the following manner:
WIN = 5pts.
PLACE = 3pts.
SHOW = 1pt.
The winner having the highest accumulated score in the four races will recieve the GRAND PRIZE OF 100 CREDITS and the unofficial title of “BEST IN THE BARN”.
So without further ado, I would like to introduce today’s contestants….
In this corner representing the TEST BARN, in lieu of their fearless leader Larry Fine who has taken a leave of absence, to go on tour with his comedy act(The Three Stooges and is also helping Mr. Curly campaign in this year’s Presidential race), and weighing in at a trim 1250lbs. is the non-stop talking Mr. ED…
And in this corner the MYSTERY CHALLENGER, representing no one but themselves and weighing in at a cool Buck and a half….. THE CHALLENGER…..
What’s that? The challenger was a no show? Okay, hang on I’ll let everyone know.
ATTENTION LADIES & GENTLEMAN…..WE HAVE A WINNER!
By default Mr. Ed has been declared the winner and recieves the title “BEST IN THE BARN”.
Hang on everyone, comeback here. We still need to give the people some picks today! These nice people didn’t read this far, to go away empty handed. How about it guys? Hey Harpo you and your brothers did some gambling on the horses, in your movie “A DAY AT THE RACES”, didn’t you?
Harpo honks his horn twice
Ok then, look over the four races that we were going to use for the contest and give us your picks.
Harpo honks his horn twice
I will say the race and you can honk which number you pick, ok?
Harpo honks his horn twice
ok here we go….
UTAH- RACE #1 RACE ID#3735.2701 HORSE #2
DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA- RACE #2 RACE ID#3735.7702 HORSE #6
SPAIN- RACE #3 RACE ID#3735.5703 HORSE #3
NEW SOUTH WALES- RACE #4 RACE ID#3735.5404 HORSE #2
That’s great Harpo, (Harpo honks his horn) thank you very much for coming today and for helping us pick the races. You be safe going home. Thank you again!
Well folks that is our episode(such as it is) for this week. If there is anyone out there who would like to challenge ED next week? We will use the same races again, just private message me here(testbarn), with 1 pick for each of the four races, a.s.a.p. after Saturday’s Draw next week(Wednesday 6pm.) and i will work it into the episode. If you can out pick ED, you get 100CREDITS and the title “BEST IN THE BARN”.
BE SURE TO TUNE IN NEXT WEEK…
FOR MORE TIPS FROM THE TEST BARN!
FEATURING MR. ED vs. MYSTERY CHALLENGER, IN A HANDICAPPING CONTEST(if one shows up)
and THE TEST BARN “CREW”
TILL THEN…
HOPE TO SEE YOU AT THE RACES!!!