Fave Mia Then Back threatens F’ARSE command in Pennsylvania Monster Mile
Pennsylvania– Drat those F’ARSEs! Always trying to stack the deck wherever they go. Let ’em card a bunch of ol’ geriatric non-winners-of-peanuts-and-crackerjacks for their F’ARSE Domination Series earlier this month and here they go again! Give them an inch and they’ll take a mile — it’s not even June yet and they weasel their way into another dodgy race condition with the Grade 1 $500,000 F’ARSE Domination Continues for 5 year olds and up. Wha?!!?
LOL! Nah, I’m just kidding. Those F’ARSE guys are mighty swell. If you’re not familiar with the moniker, F’ARSE stands for Fatattack + Avenger + Randyraide + SDMF Enterprises. Avenger penned a short bio about the group recently in the Bugler. The group forever resides at the illustrious DelPenn National Residency.
On Derby day, the F’ARSEs saw their aforementioned Domination Series renewed for the 10th racing season in a row. That’s quite a tradition for 10 years and it quite possibly may be the longest continuously run Series in the Sim. Never heard of it? Ha! I didn’t know which was more fun — trying to find horses for the zany non-winners-of-a-picnic-basket for 7yo mares on a roller-skating surface, etc races or reading all the “F’ARSE races once again with itself, F’ARSE is in command of itself!” comments on the DelPenn message board. Yup, wacky taylor-made race conditions for yicky-picky horses that only F’ARSEs could love. And the Supers laughed all the way to the Sim bank taking the Bluegrass Oaks. Slam!!!!
[BTW — my snowchief stable finished 2nd in the Series’ stable standings. I was so happy, but joy promptly gave way to indubious gameplay reality when I rewarded myself with a self-imposed stable cleaning. What hope does a stable have when you can only finish 2nd, 3rd, or 4th in comparable NW2y four geriatric-horse fields? Yuck!]
Just teasing again. :^) Sure as hiddley-hoo looks like Wayne (Fatattack) carded this one for the glory of F’ARSE….. and for a pearly spot for his old grizzled vet Hail Cesario (8/1). Old ‘Cesario has stretched many a BTB reporter’s typing fingers these past few years. The 5yo son of Seeking The Gold ran in the BB Mile a couple of times and competed in grade after grade, winning his fair share too with 14 victories and over $2.2 million smackeroos. He’s a Monster Miler to a “T” and thensome. ‘Cesario fell off form late last year for Wayne, but picked up the beat racing in DelPenn compeny recently. He actually won an allowance on F’ARSE Domination Series day. Yes, after all my ripping on F’ARSE, I neglected to mention that they did card a couple of open allowances that drew pretty good fields. Hail Cesario was a big fave in his turf mile race and won storming with his usual late charge. A big 107 SP# signals this guy’s fitness. There’s some substantial speed in this group, so Wayne should see ‘Cesario set up well. This horse is not threw by all means — he can still throw herculean speed figures. Should be as great a spot as any for Hail Cesario.
Ted (Hijacked) couldn’t pass up an opportunity to support the DelPenn F’ARSEs. Ted entered one of ‘T” horses — this one’s a vetern of 45 starts named Unpredictably T(11/1). By Western Fame, Unpredictably T was pretty effective over 8.5f earlier this season, winning a couple listed stakes. Ted then tried the grades and the horse has been kind of yimmy-yammy finishing like 6th in a full field and stuff. Real even-steven racing — he did finish 4th in the Merced(G3) LTO. He just doesn’t look like he belongs in a Grade 1 at this point. Hopefully he can pick up a minor cheque for Ted if some of these horses croak.
I see that the GR Simsters are well-represented. They look to take down a F’ARSE race as a warm-up in preparation for July’s big Smackdown. Speaking of this year’s Smackdown (GR Simsters vs. Minnesota vs. DelPenn), where’s Jakematt and the Barb horses? LOL! DelPenn has been collectively chewing their fingernails over the whereabouts of long-lost sons. Otherwise, we’re gonna get the snot beaten out of us. Calling all DelPenners! Long live DelPenn (at least till Smackdown day)! 🙁
Dan (Given) at the GR Simsters has a couple of horses in the race — one’s an old blast from the past named Pub Crawl(IRE) (14/1). The ’05 champion 2yo turf colt still keeps plugging away with over 30 starts in the rearview mirror. Dan recently got Pubby to string together a few turf mile allowance victories. The plucky fella hit the board at the stakes level afterwards back in the 100 SP# range, but was well beaten at the Grade 1 level LTO. Additionally, there figures to be solid speed up front, so Pubby will find himself in a shootout. Good spot for the old timer — maybe some minor money. Dan also sends out a veteran 6yo mare named Whispering Sound (12/1). Like Pubby, she too is a millionaire. Whispering Sound has been pretty solid of late in and out of the ranks and most recently finished 3rd in the Frank’s Love(G3) with a 107 SP#. Toss out the yielding debacle. The stalker might prove to be a handful for the boys off a nice breather and cutting back a sixteenth too. Both chances for Dan are OK for some dough.
We another Dan (Epic) from the GR Simsters. That is, the folks who run Dan’s stables — I believe Dan’s still on Sim sabbatical. 🙂 GR Smack (14/1) won a Grade 3 over nine furlongs a couple months ago. The closer’s slam-bam 109 SP# vicotry came after throwing 100+ SP#s in the ALW ranks. Looks like the 5yo son of Sadler’s Wells just plain tossed a clinker LTO in Grade 1 company. Quite a solid trooper, but I don’t know if he’s Grade 1 level. He’ll run his race though if there’s a good pace up front.
And our final GR Simsters entrant is from none other than the Lennmeister empire. Ryan’s Azkaban (10/1) ran a bangup race to finish 4th in the ALL Comers(G1), Gee, I hate it when your horse comes back with a 110 SP# loss. Ouch! In and out of the ranks for this 5yo son of Rainbow Quest. Notice how this horse threw the big number when cutting back from 9f. Hmm. Can he do it 2-in-a-row though? That’s Ryan’s question Saturday. Very well spotted. Will try to outrally Hail Cesario.
Several longtime players (who I haven’t seen of late in the game) enter their steeds. On the far outside, Arjay’s Lear Park (8/1) is a solid lesser-grade runner. Arjay was a SRF reporter eons upon eons ago back in the days when we posted the Simpaper by hand, cut-n-paste and all. You know, there’s a lot of speed in this field, but I like this Ecton Park as a live sleeper. He’s cutting back from 9f-9.5f. Notice that big 113 SP# earlier this season in a Grade 3. Big effort by this 5yo horse over the mile. This guy could be sitting on a big race. Better watch him.
Another ol’ SRF reporter (and thankfully sometimes as BTB reporter too!) in Rharfo. Ross sends out a bit of a longshot in Weena’s Mission(IRE) (14/1). Ross sure spaces out this Century City 5yo’s races. This guy comes off a layoff (Week 3560). He doesn’t have a lot to his recent PPs aside from an ALW win. But he’s no strange to the graded ranks. At 31 starts, Weena’s Mission needs a break from behind the pace. Probably not at the fave’s level here, but worth a shot.
MrCoker needs little Sim introdution — so many players have enjoyed his race viewer that he authored years ago. Perhaps Todd and Donna run the Coker stables together nowadays. They send out Diplomatic Seattle (17/1) on the rail. The 6yo son of Monarchos has won 3 of his last 8 at the ALW level. Solid 100-type SP#s for this guy too. He hit the wall when chasing 10f LTO. Maybe the cutback to a Monster Mile will do him wonders. But will it be so at the G1 level? Doubtful from midpack, but ya never know. Good to see yas in the Sim, Mr & Mrs Coker!!!!!
Hey Seveii! The trainer of one of my favorite all-time Sim horses Duke Ali knows a thing or two about Monster Milers. Seveii brings Senor Anzio (7/1) in here after a nice ALW tightener. The 6yo son of E Dubai threw a whopper of a race two back, finishing 2nd in the celebrated Dr. Reuben Garr(G1). Senor Anzio ran a 117 SP# in that heartbreaking effort. The ALWer had just won a big listed stakes and positively sizzled. Could he be at the peak of his career for Seveii? Might have a better chance if he sits more midpack. Wildcard.
Leesnyder over at Pastures of Green gets in on the action with Yowza (11/1). And yowza it is too witha three-race win streak for the 6yo son of Pine Bluff. He’s 11-for-34 lifetime and he can run run a good split when he wants to too. Beware the hot stalker riding waves of fine form. Yowza has gotten used to the winner’s circle of late. That attitude might be more than enough to take down this group in a stirring upset. Mmmhmm.
Beefcake’s Golden Calf (13/1) rose out of the ALW ranks late last year and picked up minor cheques at the graded level. The 6yo son of Holy Bull is a middle router over the lawn though. Kind of looks like he punched well above his weight class in those grades, and then it was just one too many times to the well, coughing it up at Ireland LTO. Joins the pace hunt up front. I’d prefer to see him win at the listed level to prove that he’s the real deal first.
Pm stable sends out the flashy turf sprinter Flushing Waters(IRE) (9/1). The 5yo son of High Chaparral ran huge on World Cup and DelPenn Champions Day last season. That was around one-turn though. However, the horse did sizzle hitting the board in the Laffit Handicap(G3) for milers in his followup DPCD race. It was a huge 111 SP# and he loves secen panels, so a mile is within his reach. Flushing Waters makes just his 3rd start in ’08. This guy might surprise us with a high placing. Very interesting.
Now here I’ve done gone and rambled about the field, avoiding our racetime fave, Mia Then Back (5/1). And Madhibby has a worthy fave indeed — Mia Then Back ran titanic in the All Comers(G1) LTO, posting a heartbreaking 115 SP# runnerup effort. The downtown closer by Forty Niner has posted solid numbers ever since he won the Penn Turf Mile(G1) last December. What a flashy devil and he’s only got 15 starts too, winning nine of those efforts. We’re gonna hear more from this guy. He *should* beat this field hadns down. Must outrun fellow closers Hail Cesario and Azkaban down the stretch. Dangerous.
Snowchief’s Picks:
I gotta cut this short here — there’s some nasty storms on the way. 🙁 Mia That Back should get a piece of it and Hail Cesario too. But I’ll throw caution to the wind and take Lear Park in a spoiler.
Good luck everyone!!! Go F’ARSE…. er DelPenn, GO!!!!!!